Leach
I love it how people who have no idea who you really are feel that they can tell you how your life really is. That they know better. That they know how you think and feel and dream. That they could live your life better than you.
I feel sorry for her. She is too busy trying to analyze mine and is missing the blur of hers.
She is like a leach on my energy. Every little piece is scrutinized and turned into something that it is not. She puts it in her own terms and assumes they are mine. She picks and belittles and is quick to judge.
She is spending far too much energy trying to make me look like a fool when all she is doing is digging her own hole deeper. Everyone sees it. People have commented. All I can do is laugh it off and let it fall away, but in the dark of the night it comes crawling under my skin: nagging, clawing, biting at me. I don't want to let it, but it sucks at my soul.
Why does she feel the need to do this? Do I look like a schoolgirl in need of her guidance? Do I look much younger than my nearly 33 years? Do I seem that vulnerable and helpless that she feels the need to deconstruct me further?
Actually I think it may be just the opposite. I am a confident woman. I know what I want, and more importantly what I do not want. I'm a powerful, threatening force to her security and she wants a piece of it. I am favored by more than she is. People gravitate to me and have strayed from her. In fact, they avoid her. She senses this.
She wants what I have.
She cannot have it.
This makes her even more infuriated with the mere presence of me. She has been there nearly 20 years. I've been there 5. I am 12 years her junior and I have her title and nearly all her qualifications and more respect that she could ever dream of. Already I have passed her. She's stuck. She does everything she can to get me stuck too. It's not working.
This is not to say that I have no respect for her. In fact, I respect her greatly. For what she has accomplished, for her knowledge, for her loyalty, for her professionalism. The disconnect is, she chooses to hold on tight to what she has. I choose to share and to help others grow. Not tear them down.
Now that I'm thinking about it, she's doing this to more than one person right now. And she's done it in the past. She'll do it again and again. It is a pattern of her own insecurity.
Do I talk to her? I really don't think I will. It will let her know that she has succeeded in her task. I won't give her the satisfaction of that. I'll let her dig her own hole. I can even hand her the shovel.
Time to let this go. I have more important things to concentrate on.
I feel sorry for her. She is too busy trying to analyze mine and is missing the blur of hers.
She is like a leach on my energy. Every little piece is scrutinized and turned into something that it is not. She puts it in her own terms and assumes they are mine. She picks and belittles and is quick to judge.
She is spending far too much energy trying to make me look like a fool when all she is doing is digging her own hole deeper. Everyone sees it. People have commented. All I can do is laugh it off and let it fall away, but in the dark of the night it comes crawling under my skin: nagging, clawing, biting at me. I don't want to let it, but it sucks at my soul.
Why does she feel the need to do this? Do I look like a schoolgirl in need of her guidance? Do I look much younger than my nearly 33 years? Do I seem that vulnerable and helpless that she feels the need to deconstruct me further?
Actually I think it may be just the opposite. I am a confident woman. I know what I want, and more importantly what I do not want. I'm a powerful, threatening force to her security and she wants a piece of it. I am favored by more than she is. People gravitate to me and have strayed from her. In fact, they avoid her. She senses this.
She wants what I have.
She cannot have it.
This makes her even more infuriated with the mere presence of me. She has been there nearly 20 years. I've been there 5. I am 12 years her junior and I have her title and nearly all her qualifications and more respect that she could ever dream of. Already I have passed her. She's stuck. She does everything she can to get me stuck too. It's not working.
This is not to say that I have no respect for her. In fact, I respect her greatly. For what she has accomplished, for her knowledge, for her loyalty, for her professionalism. The disconnect is, she chooses to hold on tight to what she has. I choose to share and to help others grow. Not tear them down.
Now that I'm thinking about it, she's doing this to more than one person right now. And she's done it in the past. She'll do it again and again. It is a pattern of her own insecurity.
Do I talk to her? I really don't think I will. It will let her know that she has succeeded in her task. I won't give her the satisfaction of that. I'll let her dig her own hole. I can even hand her the shovel.
Time to let this go. I have more important things to concentrate on.
posted by Mama Moon | 9:18 AM
2 Comments:
yep,let it go.in our own experience,we now look back and think WTF were they thinking...losers...
concentrate on the now AND the future...and get rid of that demon...
Happy!Fantastic Futures!
Jay
Yep, you gotta let it go. Even in your heightened emotional state. It sounds like she is insecure. Nothing you can do with that. Let the wave pass you by. You have more important issues than her.
You are gonna be a great mom...
;-)
Post a Comment
<< Home